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Children Of The Cornhole!

Joan and Bill: Children of the Cornhole!!

Two years ago at the Opry Plaza Party to kick off the CMA Music Festival, Jaclyn was 18 months pregnant.  In fact, I’m pretty certain that Carsyn was crowning here at the show that made country music famous.  See, Jaclyn and I brought cornhole boards down to Nashville and challenged folks to a little “friendly” competition.  Despite the fact that Jaclyn’s stomach looked like something out of the movie Alien, we were amazing.  We played all day long and only lost TWICE!!!  We are MASTERS of this game . . . or so we thought!  

Today, we have returned to the scene of our greatest triumphs to rule the game again!  And we have raised the stakes!  We are giving anyone brave enough to play us the chance to win 4-day passes to the CMA Music Festival which begins Thursday!  So, Joan and Bill from Pennsylvania stopped by to tell us they were celebrating their 50th anniversary and to see what we had to offer at the WBKR broadcast booth and we decided to throw down the challenge.  Joan said, very coyly, “What’s cornhole?  I don’t think I’ve ever played this game before.”  Like moths to a flame, Joan!  Flies to the bug zapper!  So, what happened????

WE LOST!!!!!  First game of the day!!  Joan (the liar), who’s allegedly ”never played before,”  and her cornhole-ringer husband, Bill, who looks like Sean Connery, SMOKED US!!!  Final score 21-1.  Let’s spell out the score so you know how badly we were destroyed!!  Twenty-one to ONE!!!  Unbelievable!!!  These complete rookies careered it on their first outing and made Jaclyn and I look like the amateurs!

What is wrong with us?  Is it possible that Jaclyn and I play better when she’s carrying the big fat baby to term?  Is it possible that we have crumbled under the pressure of being the world’s top-ranked cornhole duo?  Will order be restored here in Nashville??

Well, I am happy to report that we are back to our winning ways.  We just defeated Tom and Colleen (from Pawnee, Illinois) by a score of 21- 11.  And, like hungry piranha swimming in the waters of the Congo, we can smell blood!!  In fact, a young man from South Carolina just stopped to practice, then buckled and ran away when we threw down the gauntlet!  Let that serve as a lesson to you, Music City, U.S.A.   Here’s a warning to all you country music fans down in Nashville for the Opry and the CMA Music Fest!  It is on like Donkey Kong!!  You better bring it!  Because, trust us when we tell you, it has already been brought!

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