I'll be ready to lead. I may be ready to lead right now. I mean, I watch The Walking Dead, so why not? I know exactly what to do.

I'll make sure my group of survivors--there shouldn't be more than eight of us--has at least three vehicles with a bottomless supply of gasoline, oil, and any other engine fluid required for smooth driving.

I'll lead us all to a farmhouse where we can hang out, unnoticed, for a couple of weeks--or maybe months.

You know how TV plays with time.

Well, anyway, that's the plan we all discussed at the front desk earlier today. I said that I'll be just like Sheriff Rick, the lead character from The Walking Dead. And then, no sooner did I get that out of my mouth, than in walked Sheriff Kenny Riley.

Sheriff Kenny is also a big Walking Dead fan. Plus, you know, he's a REAL sheriff. He's had the leadership training, has the car, doesn't panic, knows how to make traps, likes explosions, and--this could put him over the top in a competition--he has the gun.

So now that we've seen the Centers for Disease Control's zombie apocalypse survival recommendations, maybe it's now time to choose your leader. Which will it be?

(I'm so gonna lose.)