Do you remember the movie How Stella Got Her Groove Back?  In the film Angela Bassett stars as Stella, a divorced woman in her mid 40's who decides to take a much needed vacation from work and travel to Jamaica.  There she falls in love with a man named Winston.  But there's one minor detail (or two) about their relationship.  #1-  Stella has been out the dating game for quite a while.  #2-  Winston is half her age.  Well, imagine my surprise this past December when my friends and I traveled down to Barbados for a much needed vacation and my friend Leisa, like Stella, got her groove back!  Well . . . kinda! 

Now, let me first issue this disclaimer . . . and I am doing this for a couple of reasons.  First of all, I don't want anyone Leisa knows to get the wrong impression.  This was all innocent (for the most part) fun and it really was a scream.  Secondly, and most importantly, I don't want Leisa to murder me for writing this blog.

And, there!  Now that the disclaimer is out of the way . . . let the story and photo essay begin.  THIS is how Leisa got her groove back, ya'll!

Exhibit A-  This is Leisa at the port in Barbados shortly before boarding our catamaran adventure with Cool Runnings.  Little did we know at the time that a tiger (or dare we say "cougar") was just waiting to claw its way out!

Welcome to Barbados, Stella!

Before arriving in Barbados, we had booked a charter, so we headed off to Cool Runnings to board our catamaran and this is the first smiling face we encountered . . .

We believe Santa wanted Stella to sit on his lap!

This is Chris.  Chris was the boat's bartender, who was serving up delicious rum punch and a delicious drink called a Bikini Dropper.  He was already giving Stella . . . er, I mean Leisa . . . the eye as soon as we boarded.  In fact, Leisa's daughter Lori, the gal in the photo looking out over the harbor, was compelled to turn her back on the whole situation.  She was looking at the houseboats because she couldn't bear to watch her mother blossom into a Girl Gone Wild.

Now, I must explain that Leisa has a very real fear of water.  So, boarding a catamaran to swim with sea turtles and snorkel at a shipwreck site is not normally her idea of a good time.  So, to calm her nerves, she approached the bar, where Chris offered her this . . .

And suddenly its Spring Break 1975!

Yes!  That's a gigantic bottle of Mount Gay Rum and yes, that's an infamous Bikini Dropper in Stella's hand.  The last time Leisa had more than one drink was in Gatlinburg over Memorial Day weekend.  She grabbed a napkin and performed her version of a lyrical dance from So You Think You Can Dance.  I'm not sure how lyrical it was considering at one point she tripped over a futon and faceplanted on the floor.  But, let's not relive Gatlinburg.  Let's keep Stella where she belongs . . . in Barbados loving up on the natives.

Stella, if he's the captain and you're groping him, who's sailing the boat? Just asking . . .

Yes!  That was the captain of our catamaran.  To this day Leisa cannot remember his name.  We don't know whether to blame the Bikini Droppers or the estrogen overload.  But as friendly as the Cap'n was, Leisa was more distracted by Chris, who flirted with her endlessly and taunted her with his basket of treats.

6 Bikini Droppers, 2 pieces of banana bread and 45 inappropriate touches later...

Leisa and Chris, at this point, had pretty much moved to second base.  LOL!  Just kidding.  But he did tell Stella . . . er, I mean Leisa . . . that she could call him by his nickname "Chrissy."  Well, check that.  "Chrissy" is his nickname but he livened it up a little and asked Leisa to refer to him as "Sexy Chrissy."  Well, he didn't have to ask her twice.

Now, at this point, Leisa was feeling awesome.  6 or 8 Bikini Droppers into the trip, she had become the life of the party.  No, really.  EVERYONE on the boat was watching Leisa get her groove back.  In fact, when she broke out into dance on the deck, they were watching her get her groove ON!  Look . . .

Someone played that funky music for the white girl!

Leisa was having so much fun we were thinking she had completely lost her noodles.  But have no fear . . . she found them!

Noodles and the "Sauced!"

And with her noodle in hand and Bikini Droppers coursing through her veins, Leisa decided to forget about decades of fear and take the plunge into the Caribbean Sea.  Look!

We knew in hearts that, at some point during the day, Stella would enter the wet t-shirt contest! LOL!

But, here's the real kicker.  We're pretty sure Leisa's unexpected trip into the coastal waters of Barbados had nothing to do with conquering her fears.  See, in addition to Sexy Chrissy, there was another man on the boat Leisa had set her sights . . . and my Kodak EZ Share . . . set on.

This is what a buck must feel like when a hunter points a rifle at him!

Leisa thought this crew member resembled Sawyer from the television show Lost.  And, actually, he really did.  So, Leisa called him "Sawyer" the entire day and was extra thrilled when she saw Sawyer hose the salt water off himself after a dip in the sea.  Feeling frisky, her inhibitions thrown overboard like a bucket full of chum, Leisa climbed back in the boat from her own breaststroke in the sea of love and asked Sawyer to hose her off.  And, no.  I'm not kidding.  I only wish I was . . .

Oh my lord! At least she didn't bring a loofah!

Like all vacations and Spring Break romances,  they eventually come to a close.  And our trip with Cool Runnings was about to come to its.  We swam with turtles (which was amazing, I might add).  We snorkeled at a ship wreck site (also amazing).  And we saw some of the most beautiful water and coastline in the entire world.  But Stella . . . well, she had her beer goggles on. And by "beer goggles" I mean her "Bikini Dropper" goggles on.  All she could see was Sexy Chrissy.  A young bartender half her age with a Santa hat, a basket of banana bread, and a recipe for fun in the sun with his middle-aged mamasita!

Sexy Chrissy and the staff at Cool Runnings showed all of us a good time.  But Leisa's day was extra special.  She conquered her fear of water.  She had 4, 6, 8 or 10 Bikini Droppers (there is some debate over the actual number . . . but we know the number was even, not odd).  And she got her groove back, just like Stella did back in 1998 when she went down to Jamaica!