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I Don’t Like Spiders and Snakes


Stuart Franklin/Getty Images

Do you actually like snakes? That’s probably not exactly the correct question. Maybe it should be, “Do you mind snakes?”  The only one I can think of who has no problem with them–and can even put them around her neck without issue–is my sister. But that seems to be more of a “the enemy of my enemy is my friend”  thing. Snakes eat mice. She’s terrified of mice. It all works out. Not for me. I’ve always been afraid of snakes. Can’t remember when I wasn’t. Maybe I was born that way. Maybe we all were.

I remember a story my dad used to tell about how he and my mom were on a drive. They stopped the car. She got out and immediately jumped back in. Dad asked, “Snake?” Mom said, “Yes.” Gone. Many years ago, an employee brought a small terrarium to the station. Slithering through the terrarium were three baby black snakes that made, I believe, three people nearly jump out the closest wind0w. I simply issued a warning and shut my office door. Always been afraid of them. Hey, we’ve recently learned that the fear of spiders can develop before birth. Why not snakes? And, by the way, spiders aren’t high on my list but they’re much further up. Of course, when one descends on its web and lands on the lens of your glasses while you’re lying in bed reading, all bets are off. I no longer wear glasses; now I see ’em comin’.

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