American Idol: Would You Like to Take the Grand Tour? by Steve Thompson

Just when you thought it was safe to watch American Idol again... The dreaded Judge's Save can be invoked any night before the final five. What does this mean to America? Because of the timely exit of Jermaine, the producers just happen to now have a spare week with which to manipulate the audience. When someone totally botches a theme (and they will) and it's one person the judges want to win-- the Save returns and perhaps even the Nielsen viewers.

Tommy Hilfiger will be the style consultant to American Idol beginning next week. I suppose this means Colton will get a new shirt. Shannon Magrane, we hardly knew ye.

I suspect one day I'll be in LifeWay and see you have a Contemporary Christian CD. (Hey, Idol has contributed nearly as many ex-contestants to Christian music as they have to country.)

Speaking of our contestants, we now know who the ten contestants will be on the Idol Tour. Remember the Idol Tour? It used to make tons of money for 19 Entertainment. Anyway, here is a quick overview of those who are left.
10. Heejun Han:

The spirit of Sanjaya lives on.

09. Deandre Brackensick:

I think his hair probably should have that Facebook page any day now.

08. Erika Van Pelt:

Still no proof she's related to Linus or Lucy.

07. Jessica Sanchez:

For the sake of all that is holy, no more disco!

06. Skylar Laine

Our country girl has appeal to folks who don't like country. This could bode well for her.

05. Joshua Ledet:

Rumors persist that during his next song, ushers will come forward to pass the plate.

04. Phil Philips:

Leaving no (kidney) stone unturned.

03. Elise Testone:

Haley Reinhart was here.

02. Colton Dixon:

He promises all of you that you will recognize his next song.

01. Hollie Cavanaugh:

Nothing wrong with British idols.

Next week's theme: Billy Joel Songs.
@March 15, 2012 Stephen W Thompson