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Smart Car Makes Me Feel Dumb

Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images

After leaving Pogue Chrysler yesterday evening, I decided to get a bite to eat before leaving Muhlenberg County. It had already gotten dark by the time I headed back up 431. Somewhere around South Carrollton, somebody got in behind me. The headlights were enormous. Whoever it was was seriously riding my tail. I punched the gas a little–I was going just over 55–but not too much, what with all those hills and curves between here and Greenville.

The person behind–never could tell if it was a man or a woman–punched the gas as well. We had long stretch between just before Livermore where I could have been passed. I would have appreciated it. He/she wasn’t interested. He/she was only interested in seeing how close his/her vehicle could get to the WBKR van without touching it.

So, I eventually pulled over just before Utica and let this person go ahead of me. Well, I had assumed it was some huge pickup or something judging by the headlights. When the vehicle did pass me, I saw that it was a Smart Car. A SMART CAR!!!! With front beams the size of floodlights! I just leaned down on to the steering wheel and started laughing hysterically.

I was reminded of that Roy D. Mercer comedy bit, “How Big a Boy Are Ya?” Well, this boy–or girl, I guess–wasn’t very big at all. It was all in the attitude. I hope whoever it was reads this and contacts me. I’d like ’em to know they made my night.

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