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Girl, You Ain't Cute! (Photo by Seaside Heights Police Dept Via Getty Images)
Girl, You Ain't Cute! (Photo by Seaside Heights Police Dept Via Getty Images)
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Why Can’t I Be A Slimeball?

I am choking!  For real!  Entertainment Weekly just reported that the cast of Jersey Shore will make $100,000 per episode in Season 4 of the hit MTV show!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  And, yes, I meant to include that many exclamation marks!  Why?  Because I am in SHOCK (like I would be if Moon didn't throw back 3 glasses of scotch tonight)!  And, given the fact that there about a dozen episodes in each season, that means we are making Snooki, The Situation, Pauly D, and those other lunatics MILLIONAIRES!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Yes!  Cue more exclamation marks, because I now realize that my parents just didn't raise me right!

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Jason Merritt/Getty Images
Jason Merritt/Getty Images
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Must-See TV? Really?

According to any given entertainment news program, website, or talk-show host's monologue, there are quite a few celebrities out there who are clearly so "important" that they MUST be given time. Well, talk is cheap; TIME's expensive.

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Category: Humor, Television Tags:

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