It's hard to believe really, but country music superstar Garth Brooks turned 50-years-old this week.   And The WBKR Waking Crew celebrated with a very special  "Tad" Poll on the WBKR Facebook page. We asked . . . What is YOUR favorite Garth Brooks song.  The overwhelming winner was 'The Dance!"  Now, I was fully prepared to post up a countdown featuring Garth performances of the top five vote-getters!  But you know Garth!  If he can't sell it at Wal-Mart you aren't going to get it!  So, since we can't nab video of Garth singing his biggest hit, I thought it would be fun to search the web for some whacked out covers of it.  And, oh dear Lord!  Look what I found!

First, we begin with these three fools.  They are s@#$-faced drunk and decide to do their best rendition of "The Dance."  See what you think . . .

You know . . . come to think of it . . . the only thing they are missing is Moon.  He would have made one heckuva a conductor!

Now, you think they're a tone-deaf train wreck, look at this guy!  Ladies and gentlemen.  Meet the "Bathroom Cowboy!"  Yep!  That's a shirtless guy singing "The Dance" in his bathroom.  But here's my question.  Is he really sitting??????????  Because, if he is, you know exactly where he plopped down to belt out some Garth.  This is bizarre.

And, yes, he took a shot before he sang, which means he was drinking in the bathroom.  I'm sorry.  But I maintain what I have always said.  Bathrooms are no place for food and beverages.

Now, check out this chick!  Thankfully, she's not hammered, shirtless, or popping a squat in the lavatory.  But, sweet dear Divine Being, she has a UKULELE!!!!!  Is there no end to the insanity?

To loosely paraphrase a Prince song . . . "I knew a girl named Nikki.  I met in her a hotel lobby and I wanted to smack her in the head with a rolled up magazine."  Really, Nikki!  I applaud your creativity, but the ukulele is just a polite name for a cat stuck in a manifold.

But, Nikki is not the only overly dramatic songtress taking on some classic Garth.  Check out Jara and her buddy, Chance.  I think they really tap into the drama of the song.  This is just gut-wrenching theatre.

Ummm . . . can you say, "Gleeks?"  Where's Sue Sylvester when you need her?  Or better yet . . . Howard Stern, who in the new promo for America's Got Talent, blasts people off stage with a fire hose!

And then there's this version, which, as you can see, is billed as "a little different version."  And, they're not kidding.  But here's the thing . . . I actually may like this.  I realize that's committing heresy and I may never get into Oklahoma heaven.  But there's something about this version that is SOOOOOO different, I actually kinda like it.  See what you think?

By the way, major props to her singing and his piano-playing.  And major props to YouTube for being home to all these little hidden gems.  But to Garth Brooks, if you would allow us to post YOUR performances of YOUR hits on YouTube, we wouldn't be stuck with these.  But, then again, I'm glad I didn't know the way these all would end.  I could have missed all this pain but I would had to have missed "The Dance!"