I’m No Good at Spooning

Unsightly, isn't it? Yes, that ghastly little abrasion is my fault. And the timing was just as bad. But it's not the first time this sort of thing has happened...sort of.

When I was in second grade, I was sitting in the recliner watching television when I looked over and noticed an odd looking pair of scissors on one of the shelves of the chair-side table. I found out later they are called pinking shears. Who knew "pink" was a verb? But I digress. I took those shears and cut a one-inch square out of my bangs. Just a perfect notch out of my hair. Naturally I got in trouble later for playing with scissors. But the best part was yet to come. The very next day was "School Picture Day." And despite furious begging for a trip to the barber, Mom and Dad said "no." That's what I got for doing what I shouldn't have.  So, fast forward to 2011 and there I am sitting in the recliner watching television. I rubbed my forehead and noticed a blemish which was very tender, very sore. But it wasn't ready to "go," for lack of a better, albeit more disgusting word. So I did something I had done before with success. I heated a spoon with the intention of just touching the tip of the blemish. That way it would do its thing--once again I'm avoiding unpleasant verbiage--and I could take care of it and move on. No fuss, no muss. Well, my arm went a little unsteady, the spoon touched my forehead, and I got a nice burn out of the deal. And this all happened TWO days before I was to have my picture taken for the website. I guess I need to keep this in mind, this bizarre tendency to perform borderline dangerous procedures on my noggin days before my picture is to be taken. I guess my biggest regret is that this isn't Halloween; I would have killed as Mikhail Gorbachev.