Why Do Some of Our Fellow Kentuckians Leave Dirty Diapers in Parking Lots?

A few years back, there was a pretty hilarious thread on social media that posed this question- What should society do to those who leave diapers in the parking lot? The answers of that thread ran the gamut, but one of my favorite entry was the rather clever (and appropriate) suggestion that they should be made to wear diapers on their heads. While I’m not sure we can enforce that kind of Hammurabi, eye-for-an-eye, diaper-for-diaper law code, I’m not opposed to establishing a focus group to explore the legality of it.

Another reply to that question above was, “Let me guess . . . Walmart?” To THAT question, I have an emphatic answer. YES!!!  Walmart. That’s exactly where I encountered my most recent Huggies hydrogen bomb.

I spent my Labor Day morning making a Walmart run. Typically, I will only visit a Walmart location before 8am and that’s precisely what time I rolled up in there Monday morning. I saw a parking space right by a tree, so I decided to pull Fred the Fusion right up there into the rather minimal amount of shade provided by it. All was hunky dory until I got out of the car and saw that someone had launched a Pampers projectile into the landscaping.

There it was- a disgusting, dirty a@$ diaper- all rolled up into an ‘Andy Pandy’ dandy for all the world to see and, potentially, smell. Thanks goodness my nose doesn't work all that well and my sense of smell is as vacant as the decorum of the person who decided to drop this mushy Molotov cocktail into the mulch at the mart.

Can someone please answer this question for me? Why do people do this? I’m certain there are trash cans strategically placed throughout the Walmart parking lots of America, just like there are cart returns strategically placed throughout them. Am I to deduce that these are the same culprits? Are the people who are too lazy to push their shopping carts to the cart return the same people who are rolling up their deuce grenades and Hello Bello atom bombs and leaving them in the middle of parking lots?

Here’s the deal, People! No one wants to pick those up.  No one.  Another user commented on that 2015 post with a rather vivid description and summary of the dilemma. The user, hilariously named The Boob, wrote, “It’s always the grossest diapers that end up in parking lots. Not simple poops, but disgusting mixes . . . that looks like it’s been microwaved- exploding from its seams.”

Well, that description is enough for me to double-down here.  People, put your baby’s dirty diapers where they belong- in the freaking trash can. Be a Luv and Pamper the res of us so we can give you a Huggie.