Stranger Things Captures The Struggle For Self-acceptance Beautifully

SPOILER ALERT!

If you have not watched Episode 4 of Season 5 of Stranger Things, I urge you to immediately STOP READING. Honestly, if I had Eleven's powers, I would make you stop.

This story involves a major plot reveal, but it's one I am compelled to write about. Truth be told, I am writing this more for me than for you. I can't quit watching the last few minutes of the episode and, honestly, I can't quit crying while I watch it. Writing this is helping me work through the reasons why.

Actually, it took me a couple of days to figure it out. I have been so moved by the episode, which ends- unexpectedly and jaw-droppingly- with William Byers (Noah Schnapp) channeling Vecna's powers and saving three of his closest friends from demogorgons. After telepathically snapping their limbs and necks, Will falls to his knees. Slowly, he releases his fist on the left, then on the right, then wipes away a trickle of blood from his left nostril.

He stares into the camera- no longer a scared boy, but an emboldened and supernaturally powerful young man. This is Will. All of him. Fully realized.

Get our free mobile app

Earlier in the episode, Will and Robin (Maya Hawke) share a pivotal scene, one that ultimately lays the groundwork and soundtrack for the episode's finale.

Robin explains, "There was always a part of me that kinda scared me, you know?" She then discusses her high school crush, Tammy Thompson, and how her whole world was rocked when that 'fantasy' life crashed back to reality.

Robin says, "I was looking for answers in somebody else. But, I had all the answers. I just needed to stop being so $%@damned scared. Scared of who I really was. Once I did that, I felt so free. It's like I could fly."

As demogorgons prepare to end Robin, Lucas, and Will's best friend Mike, those words reverberate for Will. See, Robin explained to Will how- when she was at her lowest- she found an old 8 millimeter film of the 4th grade version of herself. She says, "That little me was so carefree."

Just before invoking Vecna's powers, Will has a flashback to his own 8 millimeter film. In it, he's swinging- alone. Then, a young Mike comes along and asks if he wants to be friends. Will, of course, says yes. The flashbacks continue- as Robin's words echo in his mind and right through the television screen- and Will is shown running through the woods dressed like a wizard. He has on a cape, a wizard's hat, and he's brandishing a stick like a sword. In that moment, he too was carefree.

As Robin's words, "It's like I could fly" ring through his mind, young Will takes his magical wand and swings it- powerfully- in the direction of all of us. It aims it right at us and it pierces the television screen. I was sitting on my couch and I felt the impact immediately. It hit me right in the heart and gut.

At 54-years-old, I understand the importance of finding your power. Like Will, I had to do it too. For the first time in a long time, I was forced to rewatch my own 8 millimeter film. I haven't done it in a long time, but I went back to where I came from.

I saw 4th grade Chad taking the swings off his playground set so he could practice gymnastics on the high bar. I saw him sitting with his radio and cassette player- listening to Casey Kasem's countdown and recording each new song that entered the Top 40. I watched him stage live-action versions of his favorite music videos on his neighbor's front porch. I watched him endlessly hitting tennis balls up against the wall of his house, alone but not really. See, I always pretended to be a variety of professional tennis players- male and female. I never had formal lessons, so I would just mimic the strokes of my favorite players and it didn't matter to me if they wore shorts or skirts. I watched young Chad standing up in front his 4th Grade class reading his friends a story he had written. It was called "The Witch on Market Street." It wasn't an assignment. He just did it because he like to write. I also saw young Chad riding motorcycles and shooting BB guns with friends- all the while fully aware he was different from them.

I also relived a conversation with a classmate at Daviess County High School. My friend Jean randomly asked me one day, as we walked down the hall to go to lunch, "Do you like boys or girls?"  You know what? I didn't answer. Chad, who never lacks for something to say, was frozen . . . in silence and time. I didn't answer because, back then, like Rockin' Robin, I was so '$@%damned scared.'

Like Will, luckily, I eventually conquered my monsters, my demogorgons in young adulthood. I'll be honest. I didn't have anyone like William around me. There was certainly no William on my TV. I didn't really know if any of my friends in real life were like William. Don't get me wrong. In retrospect, there were a bunch of us. There was just no way we were going to own it yet. When I finally decided to embrace it, I tapped into the full range of Chadwick's powers. I discovered the fully-realized version of me.

I am so grateful for Stranger Things. It's a magnificent show. It's brilliantly written and beautifully acted. But what I appreciate most about it is the metaphorical way it tackles the 'monsters' of childhood and young adulthood. And, yes. Sure! There are indeed monsters. But, like Will and me, you won't find the answers in how to conquer them in someone else. You'll find them in you. And, when you do, you'll fly.