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Elementary, My Rear End, Watson

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Well, it seems America’s newest star is Watson, the IBM computer that is schooling the greatest Jeopardy! champs of all time, Ken Jennings and Brad Rutter. He even performs the requisite “cutting up” with host Alex Trebek. Now there was a bug that allowed Jennings to score a Daily Double, but other than that, it’s been a real woodshed beating. And now I wonder how other famous robots might have fared on American game shows.

Let’s go back to “Lost in Space” and my personal favorite robot, “Robot.” Yeah, he never had a name, but what a sense of humor. He knew exactly how to press Dr. Smith’s buttons, but then again “buttons” were sort of Robot’s stock in trade. He was loaded with them. So with his personality in mind, we’ll stick him on Deal or No Deal. Of course, Howie Mandel still won’t touch him.

What about the Jetsons’ maid Rosie? She’s a hard worker just trying to make ends meet, or at least trying to keep ends from getting rusted. I think I can see her leaping up and down and heading toward the stage of The Price Is Right wearing one of those gimmicky t-shirts that says something like “I don’t care if he’s 88 years old, BRING BOB BARKER BACK!” And then there’s R2-D2 and C3PO. We’d have to bend the rules and get them on The Newlywed Game. They know more about each other than most married couples do anyway.

So congratulations Watson! And good luck on Wheel of Fortune!

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